Monday, January 17, 2005
A time for introspection
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After what is probably the longest break I’ve taken from blogging, I am back. The past month has been filled with moments that have at times been painful to experience, difficult to understand, hard to see reason in and impossible to articulate in words .. and yet, here I am, trying to do just that. Well at least some of it.
I’ve always been a believer of the phrase — ‘whatever happens, happens for the best‘. Actually, the version I use goes — ‘If you don’t bear malice or ill will towards another person and do good to the world around you, whatever happens to you, happens for the best, even if it doesn’t seem that way at first’. Okay so mine’s a little wordy, but you get the drift. But every now and then there are moments that makes you question the very core of your belief system. The Tsunami disaster was one.
I am unable to explain away with my set of beliefs how there’s a ‘best’ in all of it. I’ve grappled with it everyday, while reading the news reports, seeing the footage and hearing first-person accounts of it all. And yet, I don’t have an answer, and I doubt if I ever will.
As time has passed I’ve started to be less disturbed about it. Perhaps I’ve become more hard-hearted and immune, or perhaps the rising death tolls are just figures in my head now, my mind numbed by numbers, refusing to identify them as people, as humans, as mothers, as children, as lives short-lived. Or maybe its because I stopped following the news, consciously turning away from all related coverage and thus deluding myself that the world is indeed a happier place.
Methinks this is God’s way of telling man that he’s the boss. His way of saying — Oh yeah? You think you’ll fly planes into buildings, bomb schools, and try to play God? That’s *my* domain and if you try to encroach upon it, I’ll show you how *I* do it, and trust me, you won’t like it.
While I still seek the elusive ‘greater good’ behind this tragedy, the past three weeks of working with the Tsunami Blog team has taught me more than I can express in words. Watching a completely disconnected group of strangers band together in a moment of crisis has truly reaffirmed what basic human goodness can achieve, despite all odds. Peter, Rohit, Dina, Bala, Neha, Constantin and each and every one of the volunteers — thank you.
The Tsunami has, no doubt humbled us all. It has taught us how irrelevant and ephemeral we are in the bigger scheme of things. But it has also shown us the strength of the human spirit. It has shown us how ‘one person can make a difference‘. In every person, every volunteer, every man, woman and child who have set aside their differences in class, language and race and come together to work as a team to prove that the ‘the whole is greater than the sum of its parts‘.
And thus, while some beliefs have been shattered and some questioned, one belief has been strengthened — What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Yes, the human spirit shall thrive and emerge as a winner out of this. This too shall pass. I believe that. I have to believe that ..
I had just the same discussion the other day with my friends and we ended up with a thought that may be this is the God’s way to keep the balance right. Balance of need to the supplies available, balance of population to resources for survival. There are millions of people infected with AIDS virus(3m deaths every year & 36m infected) where the only prospect is death. WHO estimates of about 5 to 11 million deaths in next 10 years with a new flu virus which the existing vaccines cannot cure. But as you said, all these makes humans get much closer to each other , find compassion and care. But its very sad humans are reminded of this painful truth in this way.
Monday, January 17, 2005 @ 5:12 PM
‘If you don’t bear malice or ill will towards another person and do good to the world around you, whatever happens to you, happens for the best, even if it doesn’t seem that way at first’ That’s exactly the thing I believe in !! trust me I haven’t met another person who said these(may be many people dont talk about it ? I dunno !) words. I still think u should believe in it.
“Oh yeah? You think you’ll fly planes into buildings, bomb schools, and try to play God? That’s *my* domain and if you try to encroach upon it, I’ll show you how *I* do it, and trust me, you won’t like it.” I am not sure about this part. Also, there is nothing “best” in all of this. Ofcourse there are scientific reasons and its a natural disaster. Other than being prepared to handle future disasters in a better way there is not a lot we can do. There is no way we can stop these things from happening in future. So just lend your hand when such things happen and yes ! human sprit will thrive.
Monday, January 17, 2005 @ 5:38 PM
I admire your honesty in saying how you have become more heard hearted and immune. We all have had to do that to a certain extent and you have articulated it well.
I’ve always been a believer of the phrase — ‘whatever happens, happens for the best’. Actually, the version I use goes — ‘If you don’t bear malice or ill will towards another person and do good to the world around you, whatever happens to you, happens for the best, even if it doesn’t seem that way at first’. –
This phrase which I have heard from hundreds of people is something I dont really agree with in the form that you put it. Its a reassuaring way to live ofcourse. I think a better argument is that whatever life hands out to me which is not in my control, I will take it and will try to make the most of it. If someone is injured in an accident and loses his legs or loses a loved one for instance I cant really understand how it can be good for him, however to live his life later, he can say ok I will live with what I have and make the most of it. If life gives you lemons then you make lemonade, thats fine, but the fact that life gave you lemons is in itself not good is it ? You can “make” it good, sure.
This is also somehow related to the phenomena called Cognitive Disonance.
Methinks this is God’s way of telling man that he’s the boss. His way of saying — Oh yeah? You think you’ll fly planes into buildings, bomb schools, and try to play God? That’s *my* domain and if you try to encroach upon it, I’ll show you how *I* do it, and trust me, you won’t like it.This is also a twist to the classic response which goes by “This is God’s punishment to you mere mortals for being bad “..
But who decides who deserves it ? Why should some of the poorest people in the world lose all of their belongings and the loved ones ?
Do read this :
http://middlestage.blogspot.com/2004/12/do-you-still-believe-in-god.html
Monday, January 17, 2005 @ 8:13 PM
Welcome back Megha… glad to find u back blogging…
Out of the blue this tsunami tragedy struck and left all of us to wonder what went wrong….
Lots have been said abt the devastating effect that this has left behind.. But, now that it has happened, the next thing we should look forward is to do the best to rehabilitate the affected ppl and take steps so that such kinds of disasters come with atleast a minimal warning… so that a few lives could be saved….
And u’ve done a wonderful job with the tsunami blog….
I’ve seen one thing happen becoz of all these disasters…. The whole world has joined hands to help the affected ppl.. and this is our strength…
I had written a couple of posts reg this… do read it..
http://coolpras4u.blogspot.com/2004/12/natures-fury.html
http://coolpras4u.blogspot.com/2005/01/new-year-and-start-of-new-life.html
Tuesday, January 18, 2005 @ 4:20 AM
well after i read anirudh’s comment, only one thought came to my mind…
Yes, I still believe in God because I not only see the ppl whose lives were taken but I also see the ppl, from children of 5yrs to old ones of 70 yrs, surviving the wrath of nature miracuously, drifting in the ocean for days without food and water. I’d say my belief got even stronger.
Wednesday, January 19, 2005 @ 3:04 AM
human.inhuman.tragedy.compassion…the walk of life when nature wakes up moody and hungry.
Wednesday, January 19, 2005 @ 5:53 AM
“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”
A line worth remembering for the bad times, to make us realize the simple truth, ‘nothing has gone bad enough that it couldn’t have gone worse.’
(As for ur question, well, of course the girlie don’t know me. Why else would I stand there silently?? Anyway, let it remain this way. I don’t wanna hurt her.
Wednesday, January 19, 2005 @ 1:41 PM
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Wednesday, January 19, 2005 @ 4:41 PM
‘whatever happens, happens for the best’.
My mom says the same thing :)
Of course, I like your version better. It’s got the “Be nice or bad things will happen to you” ring to it :D
On a serious note, though, I prefer to believe in “Everything happens for a reason”, rather than “Everything happens for the best”. Best for whom? Best in what context? Best in the long term, or best in the short term? And best for how long?
And I have slightly different thoughts on the whole “God’s Will” thing. Those interested may read them at God’s Will? : Celestial Conversations - XVI.
About the whole Tsunami Help blog effort Megha, I must say Kudos to you and the team for the great work you’ve done. I’m sure the success stories make all the hard work worth it.
And last but not the least, fantastic work on the template of that blog!
Wednesday, January 19, 2005 @ 4:55 PM
Kudos to you and everyone else involved with the SEA-EAT blog. I could direct each one of my acquaintances there, and they invariably found what they were looking for.
On a personal note, I found out how much my kid bro had grown up, when he and most of his class in IIT-Kha’pur, with some of their professors volunteered for relief work in various capacities. Hopefully this is an indicator of the levels of initiative and activism towards which the general populace is heading.
These are probably the elusive silver linings that we can try and see, in what has been a human tragedy of mammoth proportions. I admit that no amount of rationalizing can ever even aspire to nullify the grief, awe and sheer helplessness that we all feel.
Megha, God has humbled us, but I don’t think God’s being vindictive. God loves us, and everything fits into the Almighty’s scheme of things.
Liked the Einstein quote :) Einstein never accepted that the universe was governed by chance; his feelings were summed up in his famous statement “God does not play dice.”
Welcome back. We’ve all missed your posts :)
Wednesday, January 19, 2005 @ 7:00 PM
Hey megha,
Nice lines (that song). Anyways, lets see how you play Maslow. (He’s known for one of the best theory on motivation). I’m hopeless in this cause, but its very nice to see someone offering advices. It verifies my long held belief that on an average, bloggers are better people. (I’ve reasons for that, but won’t bore u with details).
just visited the blog on tsunami. It’s really great work, and I wish the govt officials worked with same zeal. (Have no idea how they worked, but can guess from my past experiences). As for the good effects of Tsunami, I read somewhere that it might make the soil very fertile as it brings with it rich sea minerals. But then, whats a land for without the people.
Thursday, January 20, 2005 @ 5:17 AM
hey great blog u have here…will visit regularly…
Thursday, January 20, 2005 @ 11:38 AM
I am really taken aback by your efforts towards the tsunami relief. We being in India did not do anything special except for giving a day’s salary towards the relief fund. In fact I was distributing sweets on occassion of Pongal when the same year my native state Tamil Nadu was hit by Tsunami. Your words have definitely made me do some thinking.
Friday, January 21, 2005 @ 3:50 AM
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Tuesday, January 25, 2005 @ 4:00 PM
Thank you all for writing in and sharing how you feel. I usually respond to everyone’s comments individually giving my own (wordy) thoughts on them, but I’m making an exception this time. As is true with most things in life, there are no absolute rights and wrongs on this topic too, just different perspectives. We each find our own mechanisms to deal with events like this, be it denial, anger, sadness, acceptance or a combination of them all. You have yours and I have mine.
However I would like to clarify something here, since my words seem to have been misinterpreted by some.
I wasn’t suggesting that the tsunami was God’s way of unleashing his fury on mankind because of their misdeeds. Even if he were to do that, punishing X for the misdeeds of Y wouldn’t entirely make sense. My thought behind that comment was simply that so many people try to play master and control the world (be it the Osamas or the Bushs) and then nature/God comes along and beats them all. To put it in a different way, an event like this humbles everyone, both the ‘good guys’ and the ‘bad guys’. (I refer to nature and God together as a single entity, but as Rajesh’s Celestial Conversations suggests, they could be two separate entities, one not necessarily controlled by the other.)
Now for some individual responses:
[gvenum] Yes, it is unfortunate that we sometimes need a calamity to be reminded of the goodness inside us. But I guess that’s better than no goodness at all.
[pingoo] It is nice to know there are others that use the variation I do! Yes I do still believe it. Just some temporary self-doubts, that’s all.
[Anirudh] Thanks!
[Prasad] Read your posts on the topic, its wonderful you found different ways to help. Yeah, that is indeed the silver lining of this cloud.
[shantanu] Glad your belief has been reaffirmed. In times like this, ‘keeping the faith’ is more than just a catchphrase, it’s a necessity for survival.
[bem] Yeah, such is the psychedelic chessboard of life. Nice of you to drop by!
[suneet] ‘nothing has gone bad enough that it couldn’t have gone worse‘ - so true. (As for the girl, I’ll continue on that more on your blog :) )
[Rajesh] Thank you! The success stories do make it worth it all.
[Devdutt] Thank you, just glad it helped. Nice to hear about your kid brother and his contribution towards the relief efforts! And no I don’t think God was being vindictive. Hopefully my clarification above helped. Like the Einstein quote on your blog as well :)
[divya] Thank you for visiting. Do come again!
[Padmanabhan] No effort is small, no contribution trivial. Glad you could make a difference!
Did I say I will *not* be wordy this time? Oh well..
Saturday, January 29, 2005 @ 2:41 AM
I read this in a Tinkle Comic long long time back, “Everything happens for one own’s good”. So far in my life, anything that has happened to me, be it good or bad, I have been able to reason it out as the best possible thing that could have happened for me.
And about God’s way of keeping things in check (or maybe not)…every year there has been something or the other of this sort…Dot-Com bust, SARS, Terrorist Attacks, Tsunami, … the yin and yang always prevail.
Tuesday, February 1, 2005 @ 4:23 PM
[Anand] I agree with you. I apply the ‘everything happens for your own good‘ theory to my personal life, and it has not failed me so far. But when calamities of such proportions take place, you wonder sometimes if what applies to you personally also applies to things more globally. I haven’t changed my beliefs, but I will admit, moments like these make me question them. Yes, I guess it is all about balance .. I’ve always found that to be such a fascinating word. Can write volumes about it. Anyways, that’s for another day. Thanks for sharing your thoughts on this.
Wednesday, February 2, 2005 @ 3:21 PM