Thursday, April 3, 2008
Why Al Gore prefers 70s Bollywood
· 
In which we provide an illustrative tutorial on song and dance routines in Hindi films.
Alright. Gather around peoples. It’s time to get on the soapbox.
Every time I see someone use the phrase running-around-trees to refer to current Bollywood song-and-dance routines, I get annoyed. Yes, Bollywood is escapist and unreal. But news flash. We do NOT run around trees. Not anymore. They stopped doing that, circa 1992. They’ve chopped up all the trees and replaced them with ostentatious sets that resemble space-age metropolises. (Or ostentatious red and gold, stained-glass sets if you go the Bhansali way.) Even the sarson ke khet loving Yash Chopra productions have retired their gaggle of giggly sahelis and instead prefer to feature hotties on the beaches of Sydney and Rio.
Now for those of you who don’t understand words, we have a simple illustrative example of song-and-dance routines in Bollywood, then and now. First Exhibit A, from 1970.
As you can see above, the 70s were a time when trees served many a purpose in Hindi films —
- To run around and sing songs.
- To hide behind and (presumably) kiss.
- To fill up background space when you didn’t have the budget to hire backup dancers. (Standard formula used — one banyan tree = 5.2 apsaraa girls.)
- For hero to hide behind, while chasing the villain with a gun containing a single bullet. (The hero being twice the width of the tree is of scant significance.)
- To sway menacingly to warn the audience of the storm (figurative and literal) that is soon to strike the hero-heroine. (A device used excessively in ghost stories just before villain puts buri nazar on heroine, kills her, and leaves her bhatakti aatmaa to torment audiences for rest of movie.)
- To topple over onto an obviously-fake miniature house to indicate a natural calamity of choice (earthquakes and floods being most popular) thus separating the hero and his family, only to have them be united in the end, after singing the ubiquitous family song. (For all of you who scoff at the idea — exactly how many of you have a pre-determined group song as part of your family contingency plan? Hah. I thought as much.)
Bottomline, trees were important in Hindi films and their importance in romance was no less. Without the tree, the hero had nowhere to trap the heroine so he could lean into her for a kiss. Without the tree, the heroine had nowhere to back into, before coyly giving in to the kiss. Without the tree, Jaya Bhaduri couldn’t annoyingly hide from Randhir Kapoor while singing main yahaan to his tum kahaan. Without the tree, Vyjayanthimala couldn’t hang off a branch, coyly swing her ghaghraa back and forth, and sing dil tadap tadap ke keh rahaa to Dilip Kumar. Well, you get the point. Trees — important.
Now we move on to Exhibit B. This is 2008. Notice. No trees. No nature. Just oodles of symbolism. Whoever said Hindi movies cannot be subtle?
So now you know. Movies of the 70s and 80s were more eco-friendly. And that is the convenient truth.
Damn urbanization has affected the mating dance of bollywood heros. Protect the trees. Help the endagered dance around trees.
Thursday, April 3, 2008 @ 11:20 PM
The mating dance sequence seems to have evolved over the years as Megha mentioned. Trees are replaced with more half naked girls around the hero. The new sequence involves doing a well trained mating dance (if not mating) with these dancers before he lays a kiss on the heroine. The Bollywood hero has never been this spent before :)
Thursday, April 3, 2008 @ 11:54 PM
*rubs eyes*
wow-u actually wrote a post that wasn’t about ‘it’s so long since I wrote anything!’
I like your site layout-very clean and yet extremely functional :)
Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 12:16 AM
Heh! “Well-hung metallic prop”!
In spite of all the symbolism, bollywood is still not subtle and thats sad!
Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 12:56 AM
just this: hahahaha :’D
Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 2:55 AM
And what will happen in the future .. ?
R!P wonders off :P
Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 2:58 AM
that wouldve required some effort, i suppose
Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 5:42 AM
Brilliant!! loved the dissection of the running -around- the-trees :)
Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 9:07 AM
And here I thought it had something to do with the fact that the 70’s actresses called him a handsome man and asked him to their houses, while now he is pretty much vilified as anti-marriage and anti-family guy.
Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 12:16 PM
Nice to have you back. Now don’t go back running into the other stupid one liner PJ mode :)
As for the post, you missed one point - the ‘08 numbers seem to have thrown in an inordinate number of fair skinned, cleavagy caucasians into the mix, don’t you think?
Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 12:32 PM
Judging by the tremendously high success rates of those family songs at effecting reunions, I have adopted one myself! I am also considering advising search-and-rescue authorities that they should make it mandatory for people aboard all planes and boats to be capable of using such songs. So don’t be surprised if the flight attendants on your next flight do a song-and-dance sequence for you along with their safety demonstration on how to use lifejackets.
The reunion song. Don’t leave home without one. *cheesy fade-out music*
Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 12:50 PM
brilliantly done…sometimes the simplest of things can be given such an interesting perspective..this post does just that! how about the notion of india being a land of snake charmers….that image is still there unfortunately!!! you planning to write something on that?would be great im sure!!!
Friday, April 4, 2008 @ 1:33 PM
Having Al Gore and the following pics below made me think we were going to discuss the seriousness of Global warming and its consequences on Indian cinema ( Hindi and Telugu), to alas it was’nt to be…..nice post neverthless……Ta
Saturday, April 5, 2008 @ 3:20 PM
@ Anantha,
They are being locavores since the shooting is done outside India :-)
Saturday, April 5, 2008 @ 3:20 PM
well written…
Saturday, April 5, 2008 @ 3:34 PM
Hahaha! That almost made my ribs ache!
I just came across your blog with the aid of Google (where can Google not lead you to?) and I was quite taken aback by your unique style of writing - especially, and this might come across as funnily strangely funny-yet-strange, because you are (or seem atleast) Indian - and if you’re not.. well, it’s pretty obvious that you are.. so yeah.
I feel the need to explain now: living in an (ethnically) IndoPak family in the middle of bible-belt redneck USA, I haven’t come across many Indians - and fewer with whom I can share conversations about things that umm..lets say.. go-over-the-head-of-my-family…. such as… the absurdity of Indian “serials” that my parents insist on watching (even when Seinfeld re-runs are on TV - I knowww) and how, during family gatherings, the conversation is bound to always converge to the quality of the infinite types of rice available.
Anyway, I’m rambling.. definitely. And any-anyway, I find this blog very interesting indeed! Your writing style reminds me of Rushdie and your humor of Paul Merton - and those are two of my greatest heroes, so you should be honored.
This one’s definitely going in my favorites. Good job and keep it up! (<– I realize that sounds like something an “uncle” would say but.. whatever - just don’t try saying that in an Indian accent)
Sunday, April 6, 2008 @ 1:43 AM
ha! :) have you ever … seriously…! ever considered direction as a full time career?? May be u shud join K.Raghavender Rao wid Guavas falling from the tree tops on to Heroin’s navel and try to add frills and leather to such a sequence.. ur sure to make a hit!…:P
Sunday, April 6, 2008 @ 4:15 PM
Bhai wah! Awesumma is the word (minus bin laden :0))
Good to see you back in action!
Pleasure reading your blog! (mostly - the sorries for not writing notwithstanding)
Sushil
doodlewala.com
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 3:25 AM
LOL … i loved the pictorial description using various tools ;-)))) awesome :) l
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 6:13 AM
haah! I’ll watch my Best of Dev Anand and Best of 70s songs DVDs now with new-found appreciation of those song-n-”dance” routines. When I see pink-lips…er … Rajendra Kumar chasing around an aunty with a big amboda on her head…er.Nanda or Mala Sinha or any of the 1960s actresses, and the damn flower will start bobbing in front of me just as the pink lips decide to get some action…. instead of laughing, I’ll think of Al Gore and the poor polar bears. (No.. I do not mean to say Al Gore looks like a polar bear!!!)
–
And “well-hung backup dancers”. Really? :)
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 7:57 AM
By the way, for Fleiger’s comment above…have the video for the “asked him to their houses” link…
Enjoy it here.
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 8:01 AM
Girl-Boy-Girl=Treesome!
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 12:31 PM
Gore Gore
Bernanke Chorey
(Ok, will head for medication)
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 1:42 PM
“Well-hung” props, ekistras …..
Bites a Seetaphallic.
Ooops, I mean.
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 1:46 PM
Most likely to bring
sexysoxy back ?You must take note of the punglish, in the recent versions.
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 1:51 PM
Thought that the definitive calling the cattle home song was this.
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 2:01 PM
“the ‘08 numbers seem to have thrown in an inordinate number of fair skinned, cleavagy caucasians into the mix, don’t you think?”
–> Confirms suspicion. Hun dekha tha ji, yeh madraasi ke CD pe Sweet Mammaries label tha.
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 2:15 PM
“Bottomline, trees were important in Hindi films ” ……..
errr… bottom lines more important.
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 2:22 PM
is flippin between akhaade mein billi and her.
Main kahaan jaoon, hota nahiin hain faislaa
Ik taraf uska ghar, ik taraf maikada.
Monday, April 7, 2008 @ 2:33 PM
Comrade, Comrade… No doubt, phunny and all that. And mucha gracias for the illustrated tutorial and the phoot-notes. But what’s with the sighting of phallic symbols all over the place, comrade? Granted, I might be a moron when it comes to sighting symbolism even if a symbol stood up and bit me. But still, tree as a phallic symbol?
Up until the nineties, if anyone was asked to sum up what the heck bollywood movies were about, ‘hero and heroine run around trees and break into a song and dance routine’ would have been the best way to put our four-hour drag-show in a nutshell ( Statutory Warning: No symbolism hidden in a nutshell! ) But by your interpretation, does that translate into ‘bollywood movies are about the hero and heroine running around the hero’s phallus’? (Assuming that in the Dali-sque symbolic world, only the hero has a phallus… ) The very thought makes me want to wash my brain with dettol!
And phireworks are the modern bollywood phallic symbols? Good Lord, I can’t even imagine what I am supposed to imagine next when I see a phourth of july phireworks. Diwali , then, must be some phantastic phestival!
Comrade, my recommendation - a quick shrink-check. My prognosis. What the psychologists call ‘phallucinations’ - seeing phalluses where none intended. As some good old comrade once said, “Bloggers, reader and comrades! Something is rotten in the mind of our meghalomaniac!†:-)
You agree, comrade? I thought so……
BulaBanaGosh {The-Big-Chief-who-can-hear-even-the-fly-clear-its-throat]
Tuesday, April 8, 2008 @ 12:22 AM
[BBG]:
I might be a moron when it comes to sighting symbolism even if a symbol stood up and bit me.
Given the context, that was a deadly symbolism (not to mention, nightmarish visual)
Tuesday, April 8, 2008 @ 1:07 PM
Bhule Bisre Geet [BBG] : I’d like to smoke what you’re smoking, man. She gives a list of things tree denotes. And you latch on to one caption in the pic, take it outta context and write a minipost on it. Some phallacy, no ? Let us apply same logic to your comment.
“Granted, I might be a moron” : Talk of blinding insights…
“Up until the nineties” : Talk of phallic symbolism!
“put our four-hour drag-show in a nutshell ” : Ayyyo …. drag show ? Drag show? Errr… A show might be a drag, but a drag show is QUITE different. (potentiallly NSFW)
And so on and so forth.
“Comrade, my recommendation - a quick shrink-check” … Err… looks like SOMEBODY has got pinpricks !
“Something is rotten in the mind of our meghalomaniac!” : Errr… 2 of the 17, she acknowledges, are evil. Rotten ? No, only your imagination.
Pah.
([Megah] : you left out the jhoola for the saawan songs)
(And the place for Sapna heart Rakesh carvings )
Tuesday, April 8, 2008 @ 1:15 PM
[JB] Oh. You haven’t heard? They don’t do the mating dance anymore. They just mate straight. Well, sometimes not straight too. Not that there’s anything wrong with it.
[gvenum] The movies of the 70s were about the single-minded devotion of the hero towards the heroine. The advent of Bond-esque movies in the late 70s and early 80s (Farz, Raksha, Suraksha, Bond 303) with lead characters like Gunmaster G-9 and Agent Gopi 116 (who always introduced himself as Secret Agent Gopi, thus ruining the secret, if you ask me) changed all that. Now it is about showing what a virile stud our boy is. Being spent, is a small price to pay, I think.
[Rex] Hah, we say. Since October, there has been one, I repeat, ONE post that made any reference to our not having posted anything for a long time. Our feeling guilty about not writing for a long time is soo passé and 2006. Now we just don’t post and come along and pretend like we were here all along. So phooey, we say. And thank you. Glad you like the site layout :) And welcome to the blog!
[Raj] Now now. Not everyone is as perceptive and astute as we are, no? What if the subtleties and symbolism is missed? Better to spoon feed only.
[nimpipi] Hee haw :)
[R!P] Ooh, the possibilities!
[rishabh] Doesn’t feel like effort when I am having so much fun :)
[Madhu] Thankoo thankoo :)
[Fleiger] I don’t think his commitment-phobia is a 00s thing. Even back in the 80s, when he was being invited home, he sang panchhi akela dekh mujhe ye jaal bichaaya hai, isiliye mummy ne teri mujhe chai pe bulaaya hai. That portion of the formula remains the same - girl invites, boy avoids.
[anantha] Oh? You don’t like my PJs aa? I could have sworn you named yourself ‘Anti - The PJ activist’ or something like that, to indicate that you were a crusader and supporter of all PJ lovers everywhere. Tsk tsk. Minor misunderstanding, it seems. And ah yes, very good point. I totally forgot them! On a relatively serious note - Akshay had once done a photo feature on them. Do see.
[witnwisdumb] Oh dear lord, what have I done. The skies will never be the same again.
[asad] Thank you. Am very glad you like :) Am guessing tons of people have already talked about the ‘land of snake charmers and elephants’ cliché, but perhaps one day, I’ll get annoyed enough to rant about that too. Thank you for dropping in!
[libran] Aww. I hate to disappoint. But I love to mislead. So I guess I made up :) Glad you liked.
[Gigi] Aww, such environmental friendliness. You are kind to them :)
[vibhash] Thanks.
[lib] Howdy and welcome to the madhouse that is this blog! Am glad you liked it here and hope you’ll join in on the fun! And we are an equal opportunity funda-putter. So if the need arises, we will be happy to get on the soapbox about the economics of rice production, as well. So beware :)
[rajda2nd] Do you seriously think anyone, anyone at all, would be willing to invest money in a movie I direct? If you know of such a freak, please point me to them, and I will be happy to direct the next blockbuster of the decade. As I have always lamented - all geniuses are underappreciated, and since I am underappreciated, I must be a genius. Sigh.
[Sushil] Thank you! And wouldn’t ‘minus Laden’ itself be ‘bin Laden’? Thus making your ‘minus Bin Laden be ‘bin bin Laden’. Or minus minus Laden. Which is plus Laden. Overladen. Okay, I’ll shuttup now.
Oh and et tu? As I have gently pointed out to the gentleman above, I have not said sorry for not writing since October, except for once. (I even went and looked in my archives, thankyouverymuch.) Now I simply don’t write and pretend like I was here all along. So please take note and adjust you complaints accordingly. Glad you liked though :)
[Zeus] Glad you liked :)
[Sanjeev] Aha! Finally you posted a comment on a post that was not four weeks old and so I can reply and welcome you to the blog. So welcome and all that! Glad to have a fellow Beantown-ian, Dev Anand and 70s movie-fan around here! Now that we got those formalities out of the way - Am glad to have forever changed your movie-watching experience. Now when flowers, trees and woodpeckers (what an unfortunately named bird that is, but I digress) appear on screen, instead of being annoyed by the forced coyness of the moment, you can root for a greener earth and feel good about supporting a noble (and Nobel) cause. And yes, of course, well-hung backup dancers. You have reason to believe otherwise? Do you know something that I don’t? :)
[kallu mama] Wah wah. Fundoo catch :)
[Mute Elation] Sigh. No wonder it keeps crashing.
[Craigslisp] Intended wonly. No prizes for noticing it.
[Just Wonderin] Don’t blame you. I refused to accept that for the longest time. Was convinced Hanes was a sponsor, even.
[Tinny Clerk] Pretty in pink! Small accountant did look so sweet back then, no?
[Hard Kaur] Now behave. I told you about new resolution to be nice to tiffin, didn’t I?
[Aasmaan ke neeche] Hum aaj apne peeche, indeed. Tsk tsk. And I thought I was potty-brained.
[Craigslisp] Now now. Do you really want to meet with the same fate as the blackbuck and the street-dweller?
[BBG] Always glad to fill a gap in the education of sharp-eared Native American communists. Happy Diwali in advance.
[Spanish Fly] Damn, how could I forget jhoolas! Thank you. And it is never Rakesh. Always Rocky. Poo and Rocky. Heart around it and arrow through it. Looks like you’ve lost practice?
Tuesday, April 8, 2008 @ 11:33 PM
Whoa!
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 12:33 AM
I’d say there is a good chance [:D].. try putting a poll here.. n a paypal account.. ;) I believe that’s all it takes..! and lets c.. who’d dare refuse to co-operate….(knowing ..ahem..your eye 4 detail! ) :P
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 1:51 AM
[Paddy] Tee hee hee! :)
[rajda2nd] Don’t know about the Bollywood production part, but I’m sure people will contribute to that Paypal account if I ask them to give for my mental well-being. Incidentally, my ‘persuasion’ techniques might be more effective in getting results rather than my eye for detail, I imagine :)
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 9:18 AM
Persuasion technique = play old gult songs where the hero and heroine go through a series of PT exercises in tune with the pervading music which seems to have been composed with the express purpose of reminding you of the existence of the higher octave in the singers repertoire?
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 1:56 PM
Please, please, do let us know if and when to donate — before employing said persuasion techniques…
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 1:58 PM
That portion of the formula remains the same
But it wasn’t the chhora called Gore who said such things now, did he? And even if he did, think of what he said… Given that he stands for trees, by extension, he also stands for birds roosting on trees (typically pigeons, which would normally take flight right after the two flowers touch. There’s another symbolism for you ;) )
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 2:08 PM
[Anon] I had rotating skulls with red lights emnating from eyes with chants of hreem kleem chamundaaya namaha in the background (very Amrish Puri in Jagadeka Veerudu Atiloka Sundari types) in mind when I spoke of persuasion techniques, but I like your version just as much. Of course, I need to make sure that the Gult songs with PT exercises that I will be using have generous quantities of baybee and whontyoo lou mee? thrown in at strategic points. Then we’re good. Just to be sure - are you donating for my directorial debut or for my mental well-being? I need to setup PayPal account accordingly, you see.
[Fleiger] Aink? I thought he simply said - chaahe roz bulaaya karo. What more did he say about trees and birds and roosters and pigeons? Educate? (Good catch that. Had forgotten all about them birdies!)
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 3:39 PM
OMG! u will not believe this!.. i saw jagadeka verudu atiloka sundari.. just last nite..after leaving my comments here.. man.. :D Amrish puri with a lemon dangling from his fingers….” eee kanyaa maamulu kanyaa kaaadoo.. deevaa kanyaaa”..lol.. persuation techinques..hmm.I can see tht…go ahead give it a shot, let people choose, what cause is worthy donating to.. :) ul b surprised wid the results! trust me! its a democracy afterall! :D
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 4:29 PM
[megha] And yes, of course, well-hung backup dancers. You have reason to believe otherwise? Do you know something that I don’t? :)
ahem…no! That’s not where I am looking. I may enjoy the sight of a Hrithik Roshan dancing but back-up dancers is NOT where my eyes meander to during the said dance. Definitely not to ascertain a certain hung-in-ess, if you well. :)
And thanks for the welcome. Beantown is agog again with laal-mojda craze. I live here but I do not really get too enthralled by it. After all these years in this firang-land, I’m still a cricket fan.
Also, I am not so much a fan of Bollywood fare from the 60s and 70s - not even the songs, let alone the tired formulaic rich girl - poor boy (or vice-versa) storylines… but thoroughly enjoy songs and even many of the movies from the 50s. I love and am nostalgic the movies from the times my parents were teenagers! Go figure that one out! :)
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 4:41 PM
Comrade Megha,
Little disappointed that your phans didn’t seem to get that one spends time to post a fairly verbose opinion only because one enjoyed what one read, and not out of any malicious intentions. (By the way, there was only one one in the previous sentence, comrade. You got that one, didn’t you? Knew you would.)
And since someone (a different one) didn’t get what one thought they would get, one had to be dragged through a dragging session of Dragshow 101. But it’s one’s phault, one agrees. When one lands on an apparently much-revered desi blogsite and out of the blue (and white) , one starts shooting from the hips – chief or no chief – one (again it is the same one, mind you ) will cause eyebrows to be raised and flames to be thrown. One has learnt more than one (a different one) lesson by visiting your site, comrade. Mucha gracias, and all that…
Received the jab about the Diwali wishes, delivered months before the due date. (For a boxer of your caliber, comrade, that was a pretty lame jab though, don’t you think? Practise,practise!) But if I were you, comrade, I wouldn’t push my luck too far.
You see, If you had the time and I had the inclination now (No, I am not about to suggest that we meet exactly halfway between London and Pisa), I could regale you with a story about the time I was visiting the Upper (Or was it the Lower? Never mind. Doesn’t matter. Nor does it mutter, since that’s how you prefer.) Zambezi region. The local Ndebeles and yours truly were camping the night, right by what the locals call the Mosi-Oa-Tunya, imbibing the best of their native brew. It was then that my host - the local chief, who was a little inebriated and who shall remain nameless for the purpose of this anecdote - whispered a snide remark to his aide about Native American chiefs and their flies (See, I can see you licking your lips, right now, at the sight of a sitting duck begging to be shot!) that they profess to hear. Why that most venerable Ndebele chief had to be buried before sunrise the next day by his followers - lamented by one and all, of course - is a story that can wait, until you have….. Next time then, huh, comrade? Sure, my pleasure.
Seriously, thanks for the entertainment.
And Megha-phans, ‘peas’ pliss! (Yeah, who says that a doddering native American chief should not make an attempt to sound cool?)
BulaBanaGosh[The-Big-Chief-Who-Can-Hear-Even-The-Fly-Clear-Its-Throat]
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 5:43 PM
[Megha]
We are feeling nice and kind and generous today. We decided we would help you make sense of what BBG is saying. We fired up our trusty Universal Translator. And here’s what we got.
1.
Dcaemro, …mcrdaoe On dtubo, nhnyup nda lal hatt. Dna uhcam aacigrs rfo het sluteldiatr otrutali nda teh tpoho-otens. Utb thw’as tihw hte ggthiisn fo lpicahl olsbyms lla roev het palce, aerdmoc? Atgdner, I mhigt eb a nromo hwne ti coesm ot gtisignh obmiymlss enve fi a obmyls otdso pu nad tbi em. Tub llsti, reet sa a lilaphc symlbo? Pu utnil het neiietns, fi oanyen wsa akeds ot msu pu atwh eht khec bwyolodol evimso reew uatbo, hre‘o dan eonheri urn nodura seret dna kreab iton a osgn adn acnde nuretio’ olwdu ehav nebe eht tesb ayw ot utp ruo rfuo-uorh adrg-swho ni a llunhste ( Aryotttsu Awgrinn: On slmymbsoi ddhnei ni a lsutheln! ) Btu yb ruoy irtoneiprtneta, edos atth lneratsat ntoi owdlolboy‘ msoevi rea abuto eth oehr nad ehrnieo iunrnng adnoru hte ’hosre puh’slla? (Nsamusig taht ni eth Dali-sque symbolic world, olny teh hore sah a phus…lla ) Eth yevr thgohtu asekm em atwn ot wsha ym abnri hwit oeltdt! Nda kiorphresw rae eht erndmo lwlboydoo llpciha byssolm? Dgoo Dolr, I ctn’a veen aienigm twah I ma dsppsoeu ot egiaimn xten nwhe I ese a phruhto fo uylj hkospwierr. Aiilwd , nteh, tsum eb seom ncaptashti lehivtspa! Omdecra, ym meoedinacrtonm – a ikquc srknhi-chekc. Ym prgsosion. Thaw eht itoosyhlcpgss acll oalln’anpihsuitc‘ – gnsiee lapuesslh rehwe nneo tndeendi. Sa emos gdoo dlo raeocdm noec disa, lbgOgres“, deerar dna ormecasd! Hntmgesoi si nrttoe ni het dmni fo ruo eiaglmmahoanc!â€
Ouy eaegr, adorcem? I htgthou o……s LaabHgouBans {Eht-Gbi-Feich-how-acn-erha-enve-eht-ylf-lcrea-tsi-athrto]
2.
Mcadoer Mhage, Letilt aoieitpnsdpd hatt yruo snahp i’dtnd esem ot gte taht noe epdsns mtei ot sotp a ylafri vbesoer noiipno olyn bsueaec neo oynejde thwa eno reda, nad otn uto fo nya lumoacsii eitotsnnin. (Yb hte wya, theer aws nloy eon eon ni hte ivsrpeou ensenetc, cmoerad. Oyu otg ttah eno, d’idtn ouy? Ekwn uoy dwoul.) Adn cines msnoeeo (a tdeeirfnf oen) dtdi’n etg athw neo hguhott tyhe luodw egt, noe adh ot eb edradgg oruhgth a gdrgiang essnois fo Hdrgaosw 110. Btu si’t osn’e ahlptu, noe eegasr. Hnew oen dansl no na trelpayapn hmuc-eedrvre sdei otlbegis nad tuo fo teh lube (dna tiwhe) , noe rtssta ooihntgs ormf het siph – iecfh ro on ifehc – eon (aigan ti si eth asem oen, mdni yuo ) wlil eucas borsweey ot eb eirdas nad sfamle ot eb owhtnr. Oen ahs leratn mroe anth eno (a feintfrde eon) ssleno yb iitngvsi ryuo esti, ceaodmr. Huacm ragasic, nad lal at…ht Evedrcie hte ajb aubot eht Dlwiai wesish, vedederil mothns froebe eht deu tdea. (Orf a bxoer fo uroy brlecai, eomrcad, atht asw a epttry emal ajb tuhhog, no’dt uoy tiknh? Ectrsaip,srapceti!) Utb fi I rewe uoy, edaocmr, I ln’dowut uhsp ym uklc oto fra. Oyu ees, Fi uoy dha teh emit nda I ahd hte ianniolctni nwo (On, I ma ont auotb ot esggstu htta ew mtee tcyxlea hlawfay benweet Onlond nad Siap), I uocdl egarel oyu ihwt a rysot btuoa het tiem I aws iivntisg het Erppu (Ro wsa ti teh Elrwo? Evrne dmni. Osen’td eatmtr. Rno eosd ti emturt, iesnc tst’ha hwo ouy eprfre.) Emzbaiz ogirne. Hte alocl Bdleseen adn usoyr tlyru reew ngpcaim het gthin, thirg yb wtha het lsclao alcl eth Somi-Ao-Uytan, gbimiinb eht tbes of hreti teainv rbew. Ti aws tneh ttah ym soth – hte acoll hefci, hwo wsa a lltiet bteradeiin dna how llsha raenim nmsaeels orf eht sopepur fo stih onecadet – ephdisrew a disen rekram ot ihs diea tuaob Avnite Eirmanac ichefs adn irhte iflse (Ees, I cna ees ouy glnicik oryu pisl, ihgrt wno, ta eth thsig fo a ngsitti dcku iggenbg to eb tsho!) hatt etyh seropsf ot reah. Hwy ahtt ostm renaleveb Dbnleee ihcef hda ot eb ebrudi broefe snseiur teh tnex yad yb shi eowrfolsl – atlmened yb eno dan lal, fo soceur – si a otsyr htat anc itwa, iultn yuo eav…h.. Tnxe ietm neth, uhh, docmaer? Rsue, ym uerslaep. Yoersslui, ksthan rfo eht tntetninareme. Nad Maheg-npsha, sp’‘ae sislp! (Aehy, woh yssa atht a iddndroeg ivaent Ecaarinm fehci lusohd otn meka na etmptat ot ndous oolc?)
GohsNbaaAbul[Eht-Gbi-Ifhce-Woh-Cna-Areh-Evne-Eht-Yfl-Aelcr-Sti-Tothra]
There. Much clearer now, no? And it has the added bonus of putting into words my reaction on reading the erudite fellow traveller’s comment.
You’re welcome. :)
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 7:59 PM
I really think it has been quite a while since BBG has cleared his stomach. All the rumblings .. eew! take a break bro…
Wednesday, April 9, 2008 @ 9:04 PM
That is a HILARIOUS comparison. GO GREEN!!!!!!!!
Thursday, April 10, 2008 @ 11:57 AM
[rajda2nd] Arrey wah! How cool is that! It has been ages since I’ve seen JVA Sundari, but I have fond memories of rotating skulls and red lights. But no no. As it is people think I practice Vulcan mind-melds. If I monetize it, they’ll lynch me. I don’t want my poor blog to die :)
[Sanjeev] I kid, I kid. We did the well-hung backup dancer thing to go along with the well-hung metallic props. Strangely nobody seemed to question the latter, but the former raised eyebrows :)
The laal mojaas are back and people are hoping for a repeat, so the excitement is understandable. But yes, even after all these years, cricket inspires emotions that baseball simply cannot. You can take the desi out of desh but you cannot take the desh out of the desi. Something like that. Speaking of Boston, I hope you know there’s an Asha Bhosle concert at Symphony Hall this Sunday? (April 13th.) You mentioned you aren’t such a 70s music fan, but this is Asha after all, and she is likely to sing from all over her career, I imagine.
I completely relate to the nostalgia for movies my parents grew up with. In my case, it happened thanks to growing up watching my parents’ favorite movies on Doordarshan and they thus becoming a big part of my own childhood memories. Add to that, my own love for cheese and kitsch, and the combination results in my talking appreciatively about a CID or a Bandini one moment and then clapping happily while watching a Disco Dancer or a Tridev right after :)
[BBG] Nobody here is looking to moonlight as Rocky Balboa. We’re here to entertain and be entertained and as long as we’re achieving that, it’s all good.
[Zz] Tsk tsk :)
[Desi Melange] Thank you :) Glad you liked!
Friday, April 11, 2008 @ 2:26 PM
“Poorly maintained city park named after dead national leader” hahahahahahahahhahhhaaaaa!!!!
Bring back dancing and smooching behind (and in front of) trees!
I’m so glad to have found YOU, now.
Friday, April 11, 2008 @ 4:44 PM
[memsaab] Yayy! You are here! Now true happiness comes :)
Friday, April 11, 2008 @ 4:54 PM
LOL :D
Somebody should lobby to bring back the 70’s :)
Well hung…*chuckle*
Saturday, April 12, 2008 @ 11:35 PM
I was thinking of donating for my own well being. You know like when you give money to that guy who plays an instrument at street corners just in the hope that he would stop and move? Sorta like that — except with the hope of avoiding certain topics on this blog. One should never see Krishna doing PT with a girl young enough to be his grand-daughter and call her baybee for one..
Tuesday, April 15, 2008 @ 9:36 AM
nice blog. very interesting to read. hilarious indeed.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008 @ 4:17 AM
Dude!
A very very amusing post!
Thanks for a good laugh!
Wednesday, April 16, 2008 @ 1:28 PM
Back in the gro(o)ve, I see. I is glad.
Personally, I prefer the perfectly synchronized dance routines(!) perfected by Krishna, NTR, et al. Care to blog about their superior skills?
Wednesday, April 16, 2008 @ 2:58 PM
LOL, Hilarious stuff :)
Thursday, April 17, 2008 @ 10:30 PM
That was really hilarious. Nice graphical explanations. You must check my blog (see URL), any feedback will be highly encouraging to a novice blogger like me:)
Thanks,
Vijay.
Saturday, April 19, 2008 @ 1:44 AM
I don’t know which I like best. The tree mating rituals or the urban mating rituals. Aah what the heck, 89% of bollywood movies can’t keep my attention.
Saturday, April 19, 2008 @ 12:07 PM
ARE YOU AT THE I LOVE TRASHY HINDI FILMS AT FACEBOOK YET? the group needs youuuuuuuu
Saturday, April 19, 2008 @ 2:26 PM
There is a reason why tree as props faded in oblivion…..
and tat is…. tadaaa…. excess of booty-showing in apna not-so-coy bollywood.
i presume the pics showing circa 2008 are from the horrendous movie RACE. (i will write this comment…and u all will read this, cause i spent 200 rs to watch this nuisance of a film in theatre)
so…back to topic…
with katrina’s and bip’s long tree legs…and other body parts devoid of clothes… and a useless fat sameera reddy swaying dangerously… there isnt much cinema space to accumalate all this in one frame. Let alone inculde nature-favorite trees.
Trees belonged to the time of much petite buffo hair-styled sadhana, mala sinha, saira banu and others.
Monday, April 21, 2008 @ 9:29 AM
3rd time i’m writing. why aren’t there any feeds for this site which i can read using my google reader. grrrrrrrrrrrrrrh!
Wednesday, April 23, 2008 @ 12:08 AM
Khee khee khee…wattay fun…errm, what a funny story!!! I wanted to link this to DesiPundit but realised I got here too late. By the by, I was looking for your email address but it doesn’t seem to be mentioned anywhere on the blog?
Saturday, April 26, 2008 @ 8:32 AM
I am liking i am liking, and i will be back!
Monday, May 5, 2008 @ 4:12 PM
caught up with u after a while and oo boy what a hilarious post. So how will blywd be after 30 more years? backup dancers replaced by aliens? :)
Tuesday, May 13, 2008 @ 2:36 PM
Fan-bloody-tastic.
Great piece of research!
Wednesday, May 21, 2008 @ 5:42 AM
the park named after dead national leader and strategically placed flowers.. hahahahaha!! awesome description and dissection of on screen antics :)
Tuesday, June 10, 2008 @ 12:51 PM
LOL. You’re still at it. How’re you doing girl?
Tuesday, June 24, 2008 @ 3:06 PM
LOL funny ;-)
Nice blog.
Tuesday, August 5, 2008 @ 11:43 AM
Awesome! some deep thinking and thorough research there. I think this is perhaps the most comprehensive study ever on the subject. good work!
Monday, August 18, 2008 @ 7:07 PM
….needless to say, great humour :)
Monday, August 18, 2008 @ 7:09 PM
Hi Megha,
This is classy! Yeah songs of the seventies and eighties were more environment friendly, and when flowers weren’t there to cover the kissing girl and boy there were the butterflies and bees, remember?
John
Friday, August 22, 2008 @ 8:09 AM
lol, funny!!!!!!!
Sunday, August 31, 2008 @ 8:59 AM
Awesome article…. Keep writing. The “hero who shouldn’t dance” is just too good.
Thursday, September 11, 2008 @ 10:33 AM
girl u r sooo funnny!!
loved this post - nice atention to the frlls and details ;)
and phallic imagery - haha
btw is there a feminine equivalent for phallic imagery?
and hmm i thot ‘well-hung’ was a term used to describe men. aint those back-up dancers women?
Friday, September 19, 2008 @ 2:13 PM
what a creativity..)…really mind blowing!!!
Saturday, October 25, 2008 @ 5:14 AM
mind-blowing observation … oh, i have been nerved by that running-around-trees phrase many times, but have never noticed the transition from the 70s to today in such a minute details. every sentence and pic in this post is a treasure … hilarious !
Saturday, January 31, 2009 @ 6:06 AM
Hey, I really liked this post, especially the pictures. HAHA
You and your readers might like this video that a friend sent me. It’s a Bollywood version of an iTunes spot. Keep up the good work on your blog!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nNhBwA7BLho
- Kiran
Monday, March 16, 2009 @ 3:07 PM
True. That’s the convenient truth.
A hilarious read!
Wednesday, April 1, 2009 @ 8:22 AM
This is hilarious! And so true :P
Monday, April 20, 2009 @ 9:53 AM
I am here after a long time and am not disappointed :-) Hilarious stuff…
How come I no one thought of this one before ! :-)
Thursday, June 11, 2009 @ 5:15 AM
I love the post you are the best!!!! I will continue reading your blog :-)))))
Tuesday, October 6, 2009 @ 9:06 AM